We are always behind. I get that. But what about when you are behind the behind. It is especially
stupid unwise to compare yourself to others within the special needs community. But alas, I find myself doing that.
I love it when someone with a special needs child who is trying to make you feel better says, "oh my Bobby wasn't potty trained until he was four." Yea...try six. And yet I know in saying this that there are those with even older autistic and special needs kids who are still in diapers and six would have been a blessing.
"Little Billy was a bit behind on his handwriting also! He didn't learn to write correctly with capitals and lower case until third grade." (We are in forth. Not there yet.)
The examples that have come up this week are not the potty and not the handwriting. But I do compare, feel bad, wonder if we should try YET again to work on handwriting, shoe tying, hand washing, sleeping alone.......
But there were things that I thought he would never do. In preschool the teacher tried to teach him how to put on his coat by putting it in front of him, putting in his arms and tossing it over his head. My husband said, "I can just see him at work in his cubicle doing that!" ROFL. But he finally got it..mostly.. and does it the 'normal' way now. We still help with "the bunchies."
We, as parents, have to toggle between doing too much for our children and they don't learn..or not doing enough and having frustration. We have to recognize that our children are on their own path.
In time we become comfortable with that....